Am I ready to be a parent?
There are many parents who claim that you are never really ready to be a parent. To some extent, this is true. You cannot anticipate any bumps along the parenting road or incredible joy you can feel for your children. Such joys can be alleviated by frustration, exhaustion and feeling as if you never get this parental business. The feeling is common for the parents of infants, toddlers, grammatical schools, adolescents and sometimes adult children. No matter how hard you try, you can expect parenthood to be full of success and failure. It is true that most people can have children, but the ability to become pregnant or adoption is not directly associated with being prepared to be a parent. There are a few things you should explore to find out how far you are "prepared". These include the assessment of practical and financial aspects of your life, your and your partner (if you have) emotional health, health of your relationships, partnership equalityIn wanting children and your physical health.
You can feel ready to be a parent but what does your bank account say? Having a child costs money from the beginning of pregnancy into the life of a child. Expect to spend at least $ 10,000 (USD) in your child's first year and if you plan to use daily care. These costs are likely to increase; The preschool school can replace diapers, replace the twins, and once a child is at the age of kindergartens, do not forget many costs such as school clothing, school supplies, if necessary after school care, if necessary and participation in extracurricular activities. On the way there are additional expenses, such as braces, where even with dental insurance you can pay $ 4,000-6000 for several years of orthodontic treatment.
When a child turns 18 years old, your site is not necessarily over. School teaching, even for public schools, is growing dramatically. SomeTěří Financial experts suggest that you should start saving in college before you have children, due to the expected rising costs of post -secondary education. There is also a trend towards children returning home after college, which may mean that you help your children continue to summarize and pay for life spending long after being considered legal adults.
Another financial consideration of analyzing whether you are ready to be a parent is how much financial loss you could take after the birth of a child. Can one parent afford to stay at home or work from home? If not, to what extent will your income be reduced by children's care? Some parents have found that one person's income only decomposes with the cost of childcare and effectively reduces their income in half. So the problem whether you can afford a bay should be based on the analysis, what your income will be after your child is born.
Don't be discouraged if your income level at the momentIt suggests that you are not completely ready to be a parent. If you want to have children, it is your goal, use the current time and get more work schools to take higher paid jobs or use several years of working hours to save money for inevitable and usually unexpected expenses based on parenting. By increasing your financial situation, you can now be prepared in a few years.
It would be amazing if financial stability was the only requirement for the readiness to become a parent. It can be the easiest to deal with hard work, further education and investigation. Emotional readiness can consider a little more time and having stable emotional health is not always achievable immediately.
Why is emotional health so important for parenting? Most parents can answer this very quickly. Parental children can easily bring you the best, but also the worst. If you suffer from a quick temperament, don't expect you to release your children.Children have a remarkable ability to make us behave in a childish-mate, to frustrate us to a point where we would probably prefer long-term imprisonment in a padded cell. If you suffer from rapidly changing moods, you can reasonably expect your child to inherit this characteristic.
Some people feel forced to have children to make better parenting than their parents. This is a noble desire, but you have to ask yourself if you have ever dealt with how you were a parent. A lot of what we learn from bad, average or even good parenting becomes what is called our basic structure of faith, things that we often do not notice that exist but control our behavior. Trying to replace the past by being a parent now suggests that many of them are not prepared by a bull, if you have fully analyzed yourself with this past and have not dealt with this past.
Thusabout advice before he decides to have a child. Just as you want to offer financial security to your children, you also want to offer them emotionally stable parents. If you are not yet completely in your own harbinger life, insist for several years before you get there with the therapist. We all know that the situation with high pressure can make us act in the worst possible way, and parenting can certainly be called a high -pressure environment.Try to be realistic and true in itself about how you respond to crises in everyday life. Parenting was called a series of small and sometimes large crises. Although there are mitigating factors such as sudden realization of how amazing your child is, you are in crisis regime since you are holding your beautiful child in your arms. Evaluate how well you control your emotions when you are t -you and expect most of your parental decisions to be made when you are tired. Work output analysis for a parent's parent at home to indicateIt is that these parents work on the equivalent of two and a half full -time jobs. Are you ready for so much work?
It is necessary to compare individual emotional health with the health of your relationship with your parent partner. Parenting takes a tax on marriage and partnership. If you look at your current relationship and find the environment of constant bickering, you do not see the eye to the eye, or more seriously, emotional or physical abuse, do not pass the child into this environment. Some people believe they will be able to save an unsuccessful relationship by introducing children into a mix. This is rarely the result of having children.
In fact, you can expect that tension in large relationships will increase when partners or spouses become parents. Statistically, divorcence increases after the birth of children, and spouses or Partners have much less time to work on their problems. It may be difficult to have the same level of intimacy as in your relationship before children. Both parents can be too tired of it, andThey would do a lot, but they muttered each other good night.
In addition, it is valuable to analyze whether every husband is equally ready to be a parent. If one husband is not ready, the couple is not ready. The best parenthood requires full efforts from both partners, willingness to support each other and the same sharing of workload. A partner who is "convinced" to have children with another partner can feel indignation, annoyance or total anger as soon as the child arrives on the scene. Of course, this can increase the anger of the husband, who will have to cover more workload of parenthood without support. It is a bad mix that can lead to disaster in marriage and less than perfect parenting.
In assessing the emotional and readiness of the relationship, do it with honesty. Weigh what you are giving up as a couple, the power of your partnership (or support of your friends and family if you are alone) and the same or almost the same readiness of partners and spouses. Plug you to bring children to a sourceavid and stable relationships. If these relationships are not yet, consider counseling for couples to discuss the problems present in your marriage and the subject of preparedness on parenting.
You have analyzed and worked on your financial situation, your emotional readiness and readiness of the relationship. These are great steps to prepare to be a parent. Another part of the picture that deserves so much attention is your health. Are you a smoker, a hard drinker or significantly overweight? This question applies to both parents in determining readiness. If the answer is yes, take time to commit to losing some weight and depriving these habits.
Mother's health requires further thinking. Does the mother have CAL medided or take the necessary medicines that could affect the health or development of the fetus? Before you try to conceive, check your doctor or obstetrician to discuss the impact of your current health on pregnancy.
monitor your doctor's recommendation forChanging your current health, if possible, to minimize the risk of having a child with health problems. Parenting is difficult, but the child's parenting with health or development problems is even more difficult. Work on physical readiness as well as the emotional and financial readiness to be a parent.
There is no specific control list for all the things you need to do to be ready to be a parent, but there are certain conditions under which most would be agreed to be not prepared. This includes the following:
You may be rearing this advice and are on the way to the child's expectation. They don't. Many of the above recommendations can now be implemented. If you feel that you have some emotional work, there is no time to start. Improve your physical health. See how you can create a safer financial future for your child. Get ConditionsNavy for couples if you need or register for parental courses. If you are unexpectedly (or according to the choice) parenthood separately, you are working on having support systems or support groups that can help you with other challenges of a single parenthood. Even in the first years of the child, you can still prepare for a parent, not only for your child, but also for the whole life of the child.