What Is the Difference Between Compassion and Codependence?

Interdependence refers to the common feature of all intimate relationships-an interpersonal connection in which two people influence each other's lives and engage in common activities.

Chinese name: Interdependence

Applied discipline: psychology
Application range: Social psychology

Interdependence interdependence

A common feature of intimate relationships is interdependence. The so-called interdependence means that two people can influence each other permanently, pay close attention to each other, and work together as much as possible. The factor of "commitment to commitment" is also included in the close relationship with friends, family and spouse. Interdependence can cross age boundaries and encompasses different types of interpersonal communication. ^[1]

Interdependent evolutionary perspective

The human need for companionship has its roots in biological evolution. DNA provides evidence that in other biological races, chimpanzees and bonobos are closest to us, even closer than gorillas or orangutans. In field studies of these primates, we found that they interact with each other As frequently as we humans.

Evolution theory believes that establishing emotional connections is conducive to the reproduction of races, and because of the addition of helpers, it can better take care of children. And it also helps to find food, defend against predators and predators. It shows that natural selection shapes our human and similar germline's emotional and social behavior.

Evolutionary theory suggests that emotional connections with friends and peers can help breed children. Therefore, humans, like other primates, have the instinct to seek emotions.

Interdependence

Interdependent parent-child interaction

Most of the initial interactions with parents will affect children's future interpersonal relationships, because the family is the first place where each of us learns to get along with others. We come to this world to prepare to deal with people. In the year after birth, babies can do quite limited things, but they are sensitive to certain sounds, facial expressions, and body movements. Breeders communicate with their babies in a variety of ways. This communication can be very beneficial to both parties, and they can learn a lot of interpersonal experience. It is generally believed that the quality of a mother's (or other's) caregiver's interactions with the baby will determine the baby's interactions with others throughout her life. The nature of communication will depend on the personality characteristics of the elders with whom it is associated.

All interactions with parents and other family members can affect a child's understanding of relationships. Happiness and satisfying relationships in the family will increase the child's compassion, self-esteem, and interpersonal trust. Communication in the family is affected not only by gender and personality traits, but also by cultural factors.

Relationship between interdependent siblings

Interaction with siblings provides another important way for us to learn about interpersonal behavior. Brother-foot relationship is different from the relationship between parents and children, which is often mixed with likes, hostility and competition. When each child in the family has a good relationship with their parents, and the parents also think that the family life is very happy, siblings tend to have deep feelings. Brother-foot relationship is important because it can have a good or bad impact on future relationships with peers, lovers and spouses. Brotherhood: Intimacy in childhood, alienation in adolescence, and intimacy again in old age. This is a very common pattern of emotional change between siblings. When they are young, the relationship is very close, and then they enter adolescence and youth and start to alienate. When they reach middle age, most of them will once again establish close and good relationships.

Interdependent relationships outside the family

Establish a close friendship, a relationship where the two spend more time, have more occasions, have mutual emotional support, and have an exclusive relationship. Generally speaking, having friends is a good thing, because it can stimulate self-esteem and help reduce stress. Once an intimate relationship is established, compared with ordinary relationships, it will increase the amount of time two people spend together, more places, There will be self-exposure, emotional support from both parties, and special treatments different from other ordinary friends. Usually a friend is just a person who gets along, and a close friend means generosity, detail, and sincerity-in front of him you can feel relaxed and free to express yourself. Women report more close friends than men and believe there are many benefits to making close friends.

Interdependence style

Adult attachment style is characterized by self-esteem and interpersonal trust. Each of the two dimensions has positive and negative directions, thus forming four attachment styles, security, abandonment, fear-avoidance, and concentration. Among them, the safe type has the best ability to form a lasting, strong and satisfying relationship.

Interdependent security attachment style

An attachment style characterized by high self-esteem and high interpersonal trust in Bartholomew's model is often described as the most successful and ideal attachment style. Safe people have a stronger empathy. When they interact, they can understand the relationship not only from their own perspective, but also from the perspective of the person they are interacting with. Safe people get along well with others, have a close relationship with their parents, and have a close relationship with people. Evaluation is positive.

- Interdependence Fear-Avoidance Attachment Style

In Bartholomew's model, a style characterized by low self-esteem and low interpersonal trust. It is the least secure and adaptive way of attachment. This style is associated with poor interpersonal relationships, jealousy, and alcoholism for the purpose of resolving social interaction anxiety.

Interdependent Focused Attachment Style

In Bartholomew's model, a style characterized by low self-esteem and high interpersonal trust. It is generally considered a contradictory and insecure style. This person is eager to get an intimate relationship, but at the same time feels that he is willing It is worthless to say that it is vulnerable to being rejected. The focus type is to take a negative attitude towards yourself, but have positive expectations of others, hoping to be loved and accepted by others. Therefore, this kind of person also seeks intimacy in the relationship. At the same time, they also feel anxious and ashamed because they feel that they are not worthy of being loved. At the extreme of this situation is a strong sense of anxiety about possible abandonment. On the one hand, love and appreciation are needed, and on the other hand, they always hate themselves, so when a relationship is in crisis, such people are prone to depression.

Interdependent giving up style

In Bartholomew's model, a style characterized by high self-esteem and low interpersonal trust is usually considered a contradictory and insecure style. People in this style think they are well-suited for intimacy. But do not trust any possible companion. Therefore, they often take the initiative to reject each other in their interactions to avoid being abandoned. Such people's self-description is very different from other people's evaluation of them. They will think that they are valuable, independent, and worthy of others; but others do not have such a positive view of them, and even describe them as not Friendly and limited social skills. Most of the problems are caused because they think others are bad and don't like true intimacy.