How do I set the boundaries in relationships?

Every healthy relationship, whether romantic, friendly or professional, requires a certain amount of giving and takes. Here and there you may have to spend Saturday afternoon in your friend's intramural basketball game if you would rather grow on the book with a book, or in a few extra hours to complete the project that your boss assigned to you instead of going to the movies. However, the problems crawl when you find yourself constantly suppressing your own wish to please others. Learning to set boundaries in relationships is decisive for both your own happiness and the well -being of these relationships. Although this process can initially be unpleasant and even scary, with practice, it is likely to be easier to maintain balanced relationships while saying yes.

The inability to determine the boundaries in relationships is often caused by fear. It probably often asks you to do things a romantic partner, friend or colleague. Ipkud in some cases you prefer to do these things but you are worried that not, not that it does not harm afterCity of this person, they angry them or cause them to refuse you. If you want to prevent these negative reactions, you say yes when you want to say no.

While this instinct of fear is natural, it constantly controls that it can lead you to make it possible to use, causing indignation that can break your relationship over time. Instead of automatic limitation of your own needs to make others happy, you should set boundaries in relationships. This process involves the consideration of the needs of others and at the same time to recognize their own desires as valid and important, speaking and ultimately compromising.

For example, your friend may ask you to watch your child on Saturday evening to go to dinner with your husband. While you are glad to do this, then start asking you to keep an increase in the frequency and soon find out that you regularly give up your own plans that help heru. You often want to refuse her requests and even start feeling used, but you are worried that he said no, he would not upset her.

In this situation, you cannot acknowledge that your plans are as useful as your friend and, as a result, cancel the boundaries of your relationship. You want to reset these boundaries, start by understanding that your happiness right is as important as the right of people around you. Then talk. The next time your friend chooses a sitter, inform her politely that you have plans, but that you are glad that you can watch her child when you are able. As you have always said yes in the past, it is very possible that she did not even realize that you were unpleasant.

It may take time to build a belief in the validity of your desires. In addition, expressing these desires may be scary, especially if you are used to automatically please others. Like these steps, but your self -confidence is likely to grow, and over time it will be easier to say no. In fact, you will probably find that setting edgesIC in relationships does not lead to rejection and anger you once feared. Rather, it will lead to enhanced relationships that are based on a healthy dose of mutual respect.