How can I deal with difficult relatives around the holidays?

While the holidays can be of great family community over time, they can also cause stress to deal with difficult relatives. In fact, some people will find so daunting holidays with their family that they decide to spend thanksgiving or Christmas rather than some relatives. There are ways to help make it easier to call with difficult relatives, even if it is rarely completely painless. For example, you could go through a painful divorce and know that your family will want a description of marriage and its demise. One can often distract such questions by saying something like "Oh, that's such a negative thing. Today I would like to focus on all the things I am grateful for," or "Thank you for asking me.Ng, Hanukkah) without having to get into it all." If you bring a statement back to your wishes and desires, you set clear boundaries. Another way to set boundaries is that you can plan for several hoursthat you can spend with difficult relatives. Minimize exposure to relatives to try your patience.

One problem that consists of challenges in solving difficult relatives is that many people still have an idealized picture of how the family should be. When the family is not a rockwellian picture of harmony and bliss, we often hope for a family we will never get. Trying to force difficult relatives into a form that is never suitable is stressful and mentally exhausting. This also shows more demanding relatives because they cannot meet your expectations.

It is better to accept that your difficult relatives are unlikely to change, no matter how much you want them. Establishing the mistakes of difficult relatives will probably not have any effect on their behavior at all, so the decision not to deal with gross relatives can help maintain tension to a minimum. Helps tIf consider the difficult relatives of a funny light. If you see these examiners as somehow funny examples of how you don't live, your own mood may lighten.

If you play hosts, you can be able to dispel the impact of difficult relatives by pushed your guest list with real friends or relatives that you really respect and honor. In this way, your interaction with difficult relatives is divided with the digestion of time interaction with the people you like.

Another strategy to avoid relative overload is to help not prepare food. If you prepare a sophisticated dinner, your attention may be required regularly in the kitchen. This is one way to minimize contact with demanding people while feeding your family with nice food.

Interaction with children instead of adults may also be a way to distract tension caused by difficult relatives. Get children a board game and play it during the celebration. Write them a game that canOU play for the whole family, or teach them a special song. Children usually enjoy special attention and you will be distracted from adults who would otherwise bother you.

Finally, plan the day soon after holiday as a reward for walking through the challenges of the holidays. Plan a massage, nice lunch with a friend or mini-vacation. It can help visualize your reward when difficult relatives bring you to nuts when collecting families.